Suddenly out of nothing I started feeling sad..
It soon became so strong, i had to give up trying to concentrate on the bug I was working on..

I called my friend Eamon, and we came up with a plan..
We will meet in 3omins, will have coffee together and chirp charp for a while.
May be that wil make me feel better.

I changed my shirt..
Brushed my hair and ran down..
i didnt have to tell anyone where I was going.. dad didnt ask any question..
I remember the time when in every step I had to ask permission..and explain thing...
I felt the change.

I took a rickshaw and went to natok shoroni.
It was a wonderful night..
deam golden lights.. pretty less traffice due to Ramadan..
I smelled the poluted air of Dhaka.. didnt feel the polution..rather the smell of my beloved city..old crapped one.. but it is MY CITY !! I wish one day it will be a great city in the world !! I wish !! ONE DAY !!
I wished the change

Then I met the friend..ordered litte snack and coffee..110/-
It was pretty expensive for that.
But I had enough in my pocket..
A change there too

I was drinking coffee.
Once Eamon got a phone call and went outside the shop..
i saw his long grown up figure..
looking at him I could feel how changed I am too.. considerable a grown up !!

...

When I said bye to him.. i again started feeling that weired sadness..
I sighed and suddenly decided I will take a walk to home..no rickshaw..
I started walking..


On my way I found a gift shop, I thought .. why not?
I bought a gift for my bestest friend..
No reason.. no occation.. just a gift..
I felt better.
A lot better.

then a surprise..
I found a knife !!!

FLASH BACK !

I was reading at school.. class 6/7 .. I remember once suddenly I saw this knife in a book shop. Was it 80 or 90? Since then, whenever I went there I looked at that knife and I HAD TO sigh.. I could never collect that much money together to buy it.. I surely could ask mom to buy it.. but probably like everyother hobby, I wanted to have it by myself..
BUT i never made it..


After almost 8 years..that same knife..
I bought it.. 150 taka..
Tears blurred the world..
it was A little dream of a little boy to have it..and he finally made it..
BY HIMSELF !!

I started walking again.
I saw my city dark.. covered by loadshedding..
I saw tired rickshawalas sitting..
I saw kids lying on the footpath..
I saw people coming with big bags from shops..
I saw a traffic police active..very active..
I bought a juice for myself.. I was not thirsty at all.. I just to enjoy it !!
and started walking again..

When I came home I was sweaty from top to bottom.

Time changes the situation..
Time has changed me..
I felt that very cleary ( and may be very sweetly) this night

It was 27 October, 2006
Dhaka